Are you still upset with me?
by Errol's Feather
Summary: In the aftermath of episode 13x10 Spiraling down. Olivia Benson comes home to Alexandra Cabot after her shift after the suicide outside the court house. Olivia let herself break down after it. Benson/Cabot fluff.


_**Author's Note**_ : In the aftermath of episode 13x10 Spiraling down as I always loved the interaction between Alexandra Cabot and Olivia Benson in this episode.

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 _ **"Are you still upset with me?"**_

Olivia Benson opened the door to Alexandra Cabot's apartment. In her hands she was still holding her coat. The coat that earlier that day had been used to cover Jake Stanton's body outside the court house. She should have listen to her…her Alex, not pushed this. This was the end result, his blood on her hands, or more literally her coat.

As she lay it on a chair close to the door, she heard Alex's soft laughter coming from the living room area. A faint smile by this. She couldn't even deny the fact that she loved that laughter more than anything in the world. The detective removed her shoes, put her set of keys on a small dresser in the hallway and tread further into the apartment.  
From the doorway to the living room she eyed her love. Her eyes on the TV set watching what looked like the big bang theory, most likely DVD, Olivia knew her to collect them. For a second she just watched her enjoying it, not interrupting it, then she sighed, saying, "I am not sleeping with him."

"What?!" Alexandra Cabot turned her head and looked at her with questioning eyes. She of course knew who the him in question was, she just didn't expect that to be Olivia's first words upon coming home. Especially after knowing about the suicide outside the city hall. The blonde saw it at once, Olivia's posture, in her beautiful, dark eyes, they were hardly even meeting hers. She shone what she clearly must be feeling that very moment...defeat.

"Ellis, I am not sleeping with him, I don't want you to think that because he showed up to help, I am…" her words trailed off as she looked away. She wasn't though, sleeping with him. She had before she became Alexandra's, but she would never cheat on her. Especially him...her ex. She wasn't interested in him that way anymore. Now she had only eyes for the other woman.

"I…know, but I still don't like that you two are still close," she said, looking at Olivia with her blue eyes, they were shining intensely now. Even though she knew Olivia was still close friends with her ex, she did not have to approve of it.

"Oh Alex, I am so sorry, I never meant for any of this," there it was, the emotions Olivia Benson had held back the whole day. Maybe even from the day before after the court hearing, she hadn't even dared to face Alex then, she had went home to spent the night in her flat, thinking. Now she however dropped her tough mask and let her tears fall. She couldn't hold back anymore. She needed her, her closeness, she didn't care if the other woman should happen to be upset with her.

Although Alexandra was still upset with how this case had turned out, she had a weak spot for Olivia, she really hated to see her this upset. Slowly she rose from the couch and went over to embrace her. A hand cupping her cheek, stroking it with her thumb, saying, "It's okay, Livia, it will be okay, I got you."

"Alex..." she whispered, brown eyes meeting blue, before Olivia kissed her hard. Alexandra didn't slow her down, although her tongue movements were gentler than that of her lower. It in the end caused the other woman to slow down a bit.  
The brunette backed out from the kiss, leaning her forehead against the blonde, holding her close as she whispered, "I am sorry I went to far with the strategy in court."

"It is okay, but next time give me a heads up will you," a small laugh. Her eyes shining with both love and tenderness.

"Hmm, I love that, your laughter," said she with a smile.

"There it is the most beautiful smile in the whole world," said Alexandra and kissed her lovingly. Olivia returned it just as lovingly, closing her eyes and allowing herself to feel Alexandra's love fully. Alexandra couldn't help but to smile into the kiss, due to the flutters she felt inside every time she kissed her.  
Backing out, she looked into her eyes saying, "Do you want to continue this in the bedroom?"

"I rather have a glass of red and watch TV with you if that is okay?" the detective said, her cheeks slightly flushed from the kiss. Alexandra nodded, taking her hand and leading her to the couch. Olivia sat down, flowing at the TV, Alexandra's choice of entertainment was not the same as hers. That she however didn't mind right now, the only thing she cared about was them being together. She smiling snuggling up on Alexandra's comfy couch.

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Two and a half glasses of wine later, Olivia Benson was sleeping peacefully. Her head resting on Alexandra's lap, her half empty glass on the table. Her features as relaxed as she was. One of the blonde's hands holding on to the glass, the others resting on her head, her fingers entwined in her dark strands, also she at ease.

In her silent mind, Olivia's words came back to her, "Are you still upset with me? For what happened in court yesterday."

"No," she had answered with a half smile. The truth was that she could never stay mad at Olivia for too long, in fact she never could, maybe…just maybe that was why they functioned so well together as a couple she figured. Stubborn as they both were. Looking over the other woman, sleeping, exhausted from that day's work she felt nothing but love. In her silent mind, taking another sip of her glass she wondered, how could anyone not love a so perfect woman as Olivia Benson.

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Thank you so much for taking your time to read this, I would love to hear your point of view :o)


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